PBS and KPTS want to do our part as well. Friday night from 7:00 to 9:00 p.m., we will broadcast “Hope for Haiti.” This nationwide telethon will feature Wyclef Jean, Bruce Springsteen, Jennifer Hudson, Mary J. Blige, Shakira, and Sting in New York City; Alicia Keys, Christina Aguilera, Dave Matthews, John Legend, Justin Timberlake, Stevie Wonder, Taylor Swift and more. All donations will go to the “Hope for Haiti Now” charities, including Oxfam America, Partners in Health, the Red Cross, UNICEF, and Yéle Haiti Foundation. (Our regular Friday night schedule will move to KPTS Explore 8.2).

We’ve created a web page full of resources related to the tragedy in Haiti. This page provides links to various relief organizations, tips for talking with your children about the tragedy, news coverage from PBS NewsHour and more. Just click here to visit the page.

We value our donors and friends and thank you for your generosity. During this time of tragedy, I hope you’ll also do what you can to provide assistance to the victims of the earthquake.

Don’t brand me as a naive Pollyanna.  Far from it.  I realize there are people out there who wish to do us harm.  There always have been.  There have always been terrorists too, we were just never as personally affected by them as we have become in the last decade.  But I think our best–and yes, the most patriotic response–is to suck it up and go on with our lives.  Without the cowering and whining.  Without blowing the odds of your likelihood of being injured way out of proportion.  Consider it paying your dues for (through sheer luck of the draw and probably no effort on your part) being lucky enough to live here.  I’m guessing most of the civilian population of Afghanistan or Rwanda would happily trade places with you any time.

This fear fetish extends beyond the airport.  It seems to me that the people who have the least probability of experiencing violent crime are those who are the most obsessed about protecting themselves.  Most people who live in gated communities are more likely to suffer assault (or worse) at the hands of a family member or friend than at the hands of a stranger.  So maybe you better run those background checks on Uncle Stan and leave him off the key-code list.  Note to suburbia:  You’re not in the drive-by-shooting target zone.  Get over it.

My son’s school district is notoriously fear-focused.  Despite the fact that the vast majority of children assaulted on school grounds in recent memory were attacked by fellow students, I have to run a gauntlet of electronic locked doors in order to enter.  When my older son chose to attend an inner-city school instead of the one in our area, the common reaction from his suburban classmates was that he would be mugged within the first week.  Somehow he made it all four years with life and limb intact.  Oh, and the doors there aren’t locked, either.  Go figure.

You may think me imprudent.  I see myself as quite realistic.  If you’re really concerned about safety and longevity, get rid of your car and use only public transportation.  That would increase your odds quite significantly.  Impractical you say?  I say it’s impractical to spend millions (soon to be millions more) on “airport security” that clearly cannot work if someone is determined to blow him or herself up.  It’s unconscionable to make our children think that they are at risk for simply walking into their schools.  And it’s just a waste of mental energy and emotional health to constantly see yourself as a potential victim of some type of crime, particularly for those of us who are quite unlikely ever to be one.

If you read about my plane going down on Thursday, I suppose you can say “I told you so”.  If it’s a choice between that and looking over my shoulder for the rest of my life, in my book that’s a good trade.

The past year has in many ways been one of the most discouraging and disheartening of my life.  I’ll spare you the details–many of you already know most of them anyway.  Suffice to say that the combination of the impossible job market, and some very bad decisions and behavior on the part of more than one member of my  immediate family has pretty much knocked us out of the running for Most Idyllic Hallmark Family.   But this posting isn’t a rant about the heartbreak of family betrayal, this posting is about how friendship saved my life.  Here’s where you come in.

Although I have always counted myself fortunate to be surrounded by a large and diverse group of friends, my appreciation for just how blessed I am in that regard has been demonstrated to me repeatedly and profoundly this year.  I’m exaggerating only slightly when I give my friends credit for keeping me upright and breathing–and yes, even optimistic–through 2009.    So, here’s my Christmas shout-out.  I’m sure many of you, whether you’re in my circle of friends or not, will see yourself.  If you do, know that your kind act of friendship was life-altering for someone.  Know that you were a blessing for someone who desperately needed just that.  So, forgive me if I write just a bit more personally than usual.  Though my gratitude is specifically targeted, the message it carries about friendship is universal.

To my tennis team and the Tuesday night tennis crowd:  I’ve never been much of a “team” player.  I never played team sports in high school or college, and frankly thought the whole concept was a little silly.  I don’t think that anymore.  The sense of belonging and support that comes from working toward a common goal is powerful.  It’s therapeutic to be able to lose yourself in it if you need to–and so much more constructive than many of the alternatives.  And, let’s not lose sight of the fact that you all are just a whole lot of fun to be with.  Wine on Tuesday nights doesn’t hurt, either.

To my church friends:  You win the prize for grace-under-awkward-conditions!  Where you could show impatience, you have shown forbearance.  Though I have created some distance, you continue to be warm, welcoming and understanding.  I have always been a fiercely independent person.  To be vulnerable or needy has always equated to weakness and failure in my book.  If I had to have my invulnerability stripped away–I’m glad it was in your company and addressed with your integrity.

To the rest of you who defy categorization or description:  Thank you for checking in with me under the guise of thousands of excuses.  Thank you for your courage to ask, and the patience to listen.  Thank you for the myriad social events in which you’ve included me.  Thank you for continuing normalcy, when there was no normalcy.

Though this Christmas is in some ways melancholy, I’m profoundly grateful for the thousand acts of kindness, craziness, and closeness my friends have bestowed on me.  I’m closing out a chapter of my life and facing the blank page of the next.  I’m so glad you will all be there to help me write it.  It’s going to be good.

Our trips are spent sharing confidences, heartbreaks, frustrations and successes. Pajamas and swimsuits are worn. Makeup and shoes are not. Food and wine are consumed in impressive quantities. Small tokens of affection are exchanged. Advice, gossip, encouragement and sympathy are dished in generous dollops. Small kindnesses are bestowed. Slack is granted. Criticism is frank. Personal weaknesses, and annoying or irritating habits are acknowledged, but allowed for (although occasionally chuckled about).

Last night, another group of friends gathered for a send-off for one of our number who will be in Lithuania for the next nine months on a sabbatical. As we went around our circle and expressed our hopes for what she would experience during her stay, I was moved by each woman’s ability to articulate a unique and meaningful insight into the impact Michele’s friendship had had on them, and how important that impact had been.

I’m not the first writer to try to identify and isolate the special characteristics that define friendships between women. Much ink has been spilled and film framed attempting to capture the chemistry that makes women so important to each other.

Women get it. They understand that feelings and problems are often abstract and ephemeral; they sense vulnerability and unhappiness, neediness and brokenness. They know when to gloat and posture, and when to be humble and gracious.

Women aren’t perfect, of course. Well, not quite. And we certainly have our squabbles, hurt feelings and fallouts. But these bonds endure. For decades. I like life on our planet. Beam me up anytime.